Let's play footsies.

Canada is home to many things such as gay marriage, moose, and no black people but many Chinese.

In addition, Canada is very successful at breeding humans like Willie Pickton, who allegedly killed thirty two (32) prostitutes in Vancouver (British Columbia, Canada) and then fed them to his pigs. Willie Pickton’s pig farm provided bacon and other prostitute-tinged pig products to many theologically incorrect grocery stores. Thus, a great deal of Vancouverites have masticated the hooker meat — only the Jews and the Muslims were spared. FTVS can confirm it is like bacon, but with the subtle aftertaste of a two (2) dollar back-alley handjob.

In addition to the legacy of Willie Pickton, a new entrepreneurial flesh-lover is hard at work hacking the feet off of the socialist heathens also known as Canadian citizens. Yes, dear reader, over the past eighteen (18) months, seven (7) severed feet have washed up on British Columbian shores as reported by the prestigously Canadian news agency Global News:

A human right foot in a running shoe has been found on a beach in the Vancouver suburb of Richmond — the seventh such discovery on B.C. shores since 2007. Two men walking on the beach Tuesday found what appeared to be a foot inside a size 8 1/2 white Nike running shoe.

This is, and always has been, a clear attempt to personally challenge FTVS. Never one to shy away from a good old fashioned foot fight, FTVS would like to invite this Mephistophelean foot-butcher over for dinner, and have him suckle the moist toes that complete Jack Colt’s judicious hooves.

Until then, visitors to Vancouver beware, and be prudent if encountered by a podiatric enthusiast offering some casual foot sex.

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.