Readers, this interview tested the extreme limits of lust and erotogenic mutuality. While our readership has come to expect nothing less than the most groundbreaking catechisms and inquests from the brilliant yet seductive FTVS staff, we surprised even ourselves with this dialogue, entering a previously unattainable arena of sexuality and theology.

The hedonic, erotic connection between FTVS and Deniz Kurtel is strong, perhaps too strong. Read on, but first be sure to lay down, for this interview will cause a rush of blood to the (phallic) head so robust you will likely faint at least three (3) times.

Let us commence.

Deniz, trusted sources indicate that you are the spawn of “mining magnates turned championship racehorse breeders”. This suggests FTVS has read about you in a Dominic Dunne article, or has seen your family caricaturised in a Bond film. Please give us five (5) sentences about your upbringing in the Anatolian Peninsula. Also, are you expected to marry an aristocrat (please note that the blood of FTVS industrialists Bob Albatross and Jack Colt is very blue)?

I lived in Turkey till I was 18, and had a very close relationship with my parents growing up.  My mom’s world consisted of making/teaching/sponsoring art, and she took me and my sister everywhere she went so we grew up in her art world.  My father was obsessed with the sea so we spent 3-4 months of every year on the boat, definitely the best times of my life.  I didn’t have so many friends and spent most of my time out of school taking all sorts of lessons, studying piano, riding horses, didn’t feel like so much fun! I’ve been to more parties with my parents as a little kid than I had with my friends growing up (which I believe I made up for afterwards) so the main style of dance music that was etched in my head during my upbringing was 80s electro and disco. Not sure if I’m expected to marry anymore, although I’m sure they’d be pretty happy if I married anyone!

Interesting, yet subtle. It is a coital refreshment to witness a woman of both fomenting intellect and sexual perspicacity grace the highest echelons of the electronic music circuit. Not since DJ Irene has the FTVS boner/brain dialectic been so rigorously stimulated. Please review this video (see below) and share with us what you feel you have yet to learn from the sensually virile DJ Irene.

I need to learn some cool dance moves.

Yes, yes you do. As you are certainly and cogently aware, one FTVS founding editor refused an impotent scholarship offer to pursue his PhD in Political Theory at a famous university on the isle of Manhattan, while the other is completing his PhD in Economics somewhere in California. The point, if one can be found, is this: is it both necessary and sufficient to have a PhD to impress you, Ms. Kurtel? In other words, if the objective is to explore your physical and metaphysical curvatures, must Bob go back to school and acquire his doctorate? Or would you settle for Jack and his sexually banal yet quantitatively astute PhD?

If the objective is to explore curvatures you might be better off exploring someone else, as I’m pretty flat physically — and metaphysically.

Both our mind and member disagree, but we must forge onward with this discussion. FTVS is quite certain, of course, that you are the Iannis Xenakis of the 21st century. How did your time at Columbia’s ISERP shape the mostly correct theology of your music?

Really funny … I’m sure there is a lot that influenced me indirectly but one direct influence I can remember is being inspired by studying mapping in set theory in a math class to map sound (first other people’s music, and then my own music) to color, using LEDs.  I’m working on implementing this on my live shows.

We digress. You will recall that the FTVS readership yearns for human interest stories from the exotic world of techno music’s most esteemed vendors. Accordingly, who is more nectarous when dealing with the sweet babies: Jamie Jones or Seth Troxler? FTVS observes that both men are in possession of inspiring hair follicles. Do you know if the carpet matches the table cloth and napkins, as we say in San Francisco?

I’ve seen Jamie more than Seth (who I’ve seen once) on the tour so far so I’ve been seeing quite a lot of sweet babies wanting to deal with Jamie (true story!). And the carpet definitely matches the table cloth, oh and napkins of course.

If your music was a statistic it would be (explain):
(a) sufficient
(b) complete
(c) complete and sufficient
(d) anscillary

I’ll leave that to your readership to decide.

What stochastic process best characterizes your personal and perhaps sexual life (explain):
(a) Brownian motion
(b) Martingales
(c) Markov process
(FYI: Jack Colt’s is characterized by Markov, a result of heavy self-dosings of rophynol, which usually prevents his ability to recall, well, anything.)

Well, I try to learn from my past but don’t let it spoil a fresh start, so a bit of both Martingales and Markov.

What is the role of gender when one is gurning on the donkey dust at 5am EST in the Marcy Hotel?

The role of gender at 5am at the Marcy is girls start really getting down, but there is no grinding because it’s all about the music.

Like most other aspiring musicians and DJs who are subjected to the blinding sunshine that is the FTVS spotlight, your life will certainly change once this interview is published. Fame, glory, theology and geometry will present themselves to you in ways previously unforeseen. Accordingly, will you commit to purchasing FTVS editors a drink at your show in San Francisco on February 26? Do you want to have a sleepover?

For sure!  I’m afraid there’s no time for a sleepover though as we head to LA right after. Maybe next time.

No, this time. Tell us about 2010 for Deniz Kurtel. Tell us about your album and your art. Tell us everything. Also, have you heard of sexting and what is your mobile phone number?

Album is almost done, it will probably be out sometime in the summer.  I’ve built my LED installation that I’m using for a few of the main shows during the RebelRave tour, which I’m working on improving as I go along.  I’m doing some of the RebelRave dates in the US till Miami WMC and in Europe till June. We’ll see what happens after that. Perhaps some cool projects with Gadi’s new label Double Standard.  Sure I’ve heard of sexting. My number is 888 382 3483. +69 if you’re dialing from San Fran.

That was the best sext you have ever had. You are welcome for this interview Deniz. You have achieved maximum coital satisfaction and your toes will continue to be numb for perhaps 24 hours. We look forward to seeing you at Mighty in San Francisco on Friday night, and will gladly join you in your bunk on the tour bus for the ride to your gig on Saturday evening in Los Angeles.

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As any al-Qaeda operative will tell you, an endorsement from FTVS is more influential than Allah’s consent and seventy two (72) unsullied virgins. FTVS does not endorse al-Qaeda but does genitally and theologically endorse the upcoming RebelRave event in San Francisco on February 26, and perhaps also in Los Angeles the proceeding eve. Even the most nescient of sexual Luddites will recall that RebelRave is the touring incarnation of the resplendently titillating Crosstown Rebels record label.

Headlined by the perpetually agreeable and coitally amenable Damian Lazarus, with procreative support from FTVS favorite Jamie Jones, not to mention 2010′s wet-dreamed statistician Deniz Kurtel and the fearless sexual icon Seth Troxler, this event will posolutely make the sweet babies rave, squeal and ostensibly gush with glee. It is without saying that FTVS editor Jack Colt will be in attendance to assist the said babies in reaching maximum satisfaction.

Occurring at Mighty, San Francisco’s most diaphanous nightclub with San Francisco’s most pulverizing soundsystem, the event is hosted by the lasciviously prurient Listed Productions family. RebelRave TV, Crosstown Rebels pornographic documentary series, will be recording segments of the Bay area event, soon to be aired on Comcast’s A&R Channel.

FTVS has never led its readership astray with our steroidal recommendations. As such, it is both extolled and demanded of you to buy tickets ahead of time, because this fervid slut of a show will sell out.

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FTVS favorite Lee Foss is surely the most handsome DJ/producer in the world. He also probably makes sex with women that are maybe only imaginary because they are so attractive and penis hemorrhaging.

In addition, Lee produces very good music with FTVS intern Jamie Jones under the guise of Hot Natured, is an integral artist on the Droog boys’ label Culprit (upon which his new EP The Edge is being released), and helps organize tautologically raucous parties that wreak havoc across Los Angeles each spring and summer.

Let us commence.

Hello Lee. Careful research revealed that a) FTVS readers prefer to read bout sex-related stories, and b) Los Angeles residents engage in more group sex every year than the average American. How did your group sex consumption change after relocating to LA from Chicago?

Ha, not only has my group sex consumption not increased, my overall sex consumption has recently decreased from one to zero.

Jamie Jones and your good self, the two parts of Hot Natured‘s sexual whole, share wondrous hair with a harmonious hairline and no signs of recession. Was this uncanny and almost impossible similarity what attracted you to one another to produce music? Will you two launch a Hot Natured line of gel?

The funny thing he is always accusing me of starting to lose my hair, so I guess this is one less joke he can make.

It enrages FTVS (and its readers) that your life is most probably not unlike an American Apparel advertisement shot and curated by Dov Charney. Is your reality comprised of anything other than sun-drenched house and techno, and frolicking  geometrically-attentive sweet babies?

I suppose I can say that my life is definitely filled with sun drenched house and techno, it could probably use a few more American Apparel models but whose couldn’t?  Though to be fair I think my friends and I hang out with some pretty cool girls who are attractive and frolic regularly, not sure how attentive they are.

FTVS could not but notice the MKS/MPG-80 on your MySpace. How essential is this item in cooking up a robust batch of duck butter? What other hardware does your palate prefer?

Yeah I really like the MKS-80, it’s definitely been used quite a bit on  my upcoming releases and album, though to be honest it’s been out of commission a few times this year.  Been spending way too much money repairing old Roland synths!  I use that Roland MKS-80, a Roland Juno 106, a Minimoog Voyager, and occasionally a Dave Smith Instruments Prophet 08.  Jamie and I used a Roland Jupiter 8 on one of our forthcoming Hot Natured releases and that’s my favorite synth I’ve used by far, will definitely be picking one of those up down the road. To be honest the Juno 106 gets the most work of my gear.

The bassline on Charmer is gratifyingly potbellied. To what extent can we credit the MKS-80 with consecrating such a rotund sound? FTVS enjoys hearing this one on the Standard Rooftop.

Well glad to hear you like the track, I actually think that particular bass I got out of the Juno, but the MKS-80 does have some great bass sounds.

Another recent survey conducted by Gallop and the FTVS intern squadron indicates most techno producers are Caucasian. Is techno music thus racist, like NASCAR?

I think it is some kind of conspiracy headed by the National Hockey League. My friend Rafeeq once told Lee Curtiss that his basslines are racist, so there could be something to this.

Dear Lee, do not worry. It is almost over. Please follow these instructions. Go to your own MySpace and set Leectric Feel (MGMT re-edit) to the 1:00 mark. Click play and then watch the video pasted below. Describe your emotion. FTVS is reminded of Bill Patrick.

Yeah, me too.

FTVS will throw a party as soon as FTVS musician and editor Jack Colt figures out how to plug his TB-303 into his Toshiba computer (live set). Will you DJ for free (opening DJ for Jack Colt) and provide many hundreds of libidinous gentlewomen? Of course you will. You are so handsome.

How many hundreds of gentlewomen?

Tell us about Lee Foss in 2010.

Hmm 2010 should be really cool.  Have a couple releases on Culprit and Wolf + Lamb to finish 2009, then we have a Hot Natured release on Culprit out the beginning of 2010, then a remix EP, then my debut album comes out on Culprit in early April which I am really excited about.  I’m going to work on a live set for Miami which will be a first for me. Jamie and I will also launch our own label, and continue to to do Hot Natured parties and original material and edits for our label and the other labels we’ve been working with till now.

I’ll probably spend about 1/3 of my time in London next year, and  I’m looking forward to being around my group of friends there, as I haven’t been able to see as much of them as I would have liked the last few years.  I’ll also probably spend a lot of time in NY with the Wolf + Lamb guys, and  I already cant wait for next year’s round of Standard parties in LA and the scene continuing to grow here and Culprit continuing to grow as well.

You’re welcome Lee. About 400 gentlewomen will suffice. FTVS will tenderize them all whilst playing a game of find the fishsticks, to which The Edge EP will undoubtedly serve as a most suitable soundtrack.

[MP3] Hot Natured – Red Light District (Culprit)

Hot Natured – h.e.a.d.s EP (Culprit) [buy it on beatport]

Lee Foss – The Edge (Culprit) [buy it on beatport]

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